So the first thing I heard when I got up this morning is that Maurice Gibb died. Starting a day with a rock star death is never good. Remember when Sonny Bono died? My alarm clock went off, and even though it was set to ABC news, they were playing a snippet of I Got You Babe. "Uh-oh," I thought. It was then announced that Sonny Bono had died. I called work, told them I was taking a personal holiday, and spent the day watching CNN. And it's not like I was a giant Sonny Bono fan or anything, I just wanted to make sure the news was properly respectful.
And now, we have the same problem about to crop up for Maurice Gibb. Will the news give him the proper respect he deserves? They did two days ago, when I first heard that he had been hospitalized, and that Robin Gibb had released a statement. I don't remember what that statement was. Something about having hope. I kind of tuned out once I heard the name Robin Gibb mentioned. Why did he have to make the statement? He was probably the one suffering the most, other than Maurice. Robin and Maurice are twins. Twins! That means they have that freaky twin thing happening.
So why did Robin Gibb have to make the statement? Then I had two Gibb brothers to worry about. I figured, well, Maurice best get better, or bad things will happen. He can't die! Then Robin will have to walk around the rest of his life feeling like he is missing an arm, or the freaky twin thing could take a horrible toll and Robin will die soon after. So obviously, I thought, Maurice has to get better. End of discussion.
Well, that wasn't the end of the discussion. Everyone start worrying about Robin Gibb...now! And prepare yourselves for some terrible news reporting. I read the AP story that Yahoo! had posted, and it referred to the Bee Gees as a disco band. What? A disco band? Just because they had some huge disco hits doesn't make them a disco band. They had been recording since 1967. 1967! I'll have to check my timeline, but I'm fairly certain that pre-dates disco.
I heard something on the television where the reporter was making the point that the Bee Gees were more than just a disco act. Well, duh. I am filled with rage that it is something that needs to be pointed out to the general public. This is going to keep the hardcore lifelong Bee Gees fans from getting the in-depth news that they crave.
And in the meantime, the Freddie Mercury Syndrome is going to crop up. You know the Freddie Mercury Syndrome, last seen when John Entwistle died. That is when all kinds of musicians appear out of the blue, announcing just how much they love the group of the deceased rock star, even when they have never, ever mentioned it previously. Bee Gees fans are going to be saying, "Kid Rock, who are you and why do I care what you think about Maurice Gibb?"
In honor of Maurice Gibb, I would like to offer up the third Rocksnobs Rule Of Etiquette. It is very much based on the newsflash of 12-24 written for Joe Strummer fans. In fact, I was going to get around to making it a new rule eventually, but now is the correct time, because being a Bee Gees fan is not as fashionable as being a Clash fan.
And here is the third Rocksnobs Rule Of Etiquette:
When your favorite rock star dies, you be as sad as you like for as long as you like. If anyone makes fun of you for mourning your rock star, spit in their eye. (If your aim is poor, you may want to do it figuratively and not literally.) You don't have to take any crap from people who don't understand rock and roll.
In closing, don't write the Bee Gees off as nothing more than a disco act, and don't write Maurice Gibb off as someone unimportant in music. Anyone who recorded for that many years and sold that many albums has contributed an awful lot to millions of people. And if the only Bee Gees songs you know are the disco hits, (and I am in this category, for the most part) that's okay too. They're the best disco songs ever recorded, so you could do worse. Put on your Saturday Night Fever soundtrack, (It sold 30 million copies. I know you have it.), and to paraphrase Morrissey, hear Maurice 's voice in your head and think of him kindly.