I was thinking the other day, I sure am glad no one ever asks me to name my favorite song. The conversation would go something like this:
Person: "What's your favorite song?"
Me: "Um. Hmm. Well, it's Bus Stop. No, wait, it's Mother's Little Helper, oooh, what about The March Of The Black Queen? Well, if I'm going to go with a Queen song I'm going to have to say Great King Rat. He was a dirty old man and a dirty old man was he. No, not Great King Rat. Maybe it's not Queen at all. Maybe it's The Seeker. No! It's Lola! Oh wait, this is so obvious, but I think it's Space Oddity. Well, no, it can't be Space Oddity because it's She Floated Away. Grant Hart wrote that one and if you play me a Bob Mould tune and a Grant Hart tune, I'm always going to pick Grant's song. I like his style so well. Wait, I like Daydream Believer! And I like Don't Be Cruel! The Elvis version, not the Cheap Trick version, although I think the Cheap Trick version is excellent and did you see Robin Zander's hair in the video? And Bun E. Carlos dressed as Elvis! But if I have to pick an Elvis song I think I'm going to go with Jailhouse Rock, even though LCG and I love to sing In The Ghetto best of all when we aren't singing Journey. Oh! Wheel In The Sky! No...."
Person: "Okay."
Well, if that was a regular person, they probably would have backed away slowly halfway through my answer. If that person was LCG, a two way conversation would have taken place, with him countering every song I named with another song that I might like just a little bit more. And then he would point out the twenty artists I had forgotten about. And six hours later the conversation would be done. Point being, it's probably just as well that people I don't know don't ask me about my favorite song, because I don't think I have one. I assume that is because I am not twelve years old.
When I was twelve, I had stamina. I could listen to the same song over and over again for hours, no problem. The failed Maggie May Counter is proof that I can no longer do that. But no one ever asks me to name my favorite tune, and that is probably another side effect of no longer being twelve years old.
However, one of these days, someone is going to ask me to name my favorite album, and I'm not going to be able to do that. Should that be? I was just driving along, minding my own business when it occurred to me: I don't think I have a favorite album.
Some of you may be shouting at your monitors now, "It's Queen II you freak! You know it, I know it, just admit it and be done with it!" While I admit that I use Queen II as an important barometer for many things, I don't know if it is my all time favorite album, ever. I don't even know if it is my favorite Queen album. When someone asks me what my favorite Queen album is, I say, "The first five." Then I realize I left out Jazz and The Game and A Kind Of Magic and I weep. I am not equipped to make such a decision.
Now try to point out how much I love The Rise And Fall Of Ziggy Stardust And The Spiders From Mars. Well, yes, I love that album, but I don't even know if it is my favorite David Bowie record, much less my favorite record ever. So what is my favorite album? Space Oddity? Love Gun? Tim? Operation: Mindcrime?
I don't know why this is so difficult. It didn't used to be. I think it's because I got older and my exposure to music expanded. It has gotten harder to narrow down a favorite album, because so many albums have so much goodness to offer. I don't know when the lines blurred, but let's take a peek and try to figure it out, shall we?
Favorite Albums, 1984-1991. Not all years are represented, some are over-represented, you know how it is when you have favorite albums. Or, used to have favorite albums.
1984: Thriller
1986: Hunting High And Low
1987: True Blue
1987: Slippery When Wet
1987: Look What The Cat Dragged In
1987: Appetite For Destruction
1988: Operation: Mindcrime
1989: Hang Time
1990: And The Horse They Rode In On
1991: Innuendo
So, we have here Michael Jackson, a-ha, Madonna, Bon Jovi, Poison, Guns N' Roses, Queensrÿche, two Soul Asylums, and Queen. The timeline goes from ages ten to seventeen, and as I got older, I see that I moved smoothly from teen idols to commercially successful bands that wore makeup to bands I read about in the guitar magazines.
If I believe my timeline, and I don't see why I wouldn't, I haven't had a favorite album since I was seventeen. But at this point, why do I need one? There is no time for a favorite! I have so many good records already, and there are still so many good records I have yet to discover, how could I ever pick just one?