In the last couple of weeks, I have been giving some thought to two songs I enjoy very much. One of them is Forever In Blue Jeans by Neil Diamond, and the other is Tight Fittin' Jeans by Conway Twitty. The more I think about these two songs, the more I notice just how much they have in common. The most obvious similarity is that they both refer to jeans in the song title, but upon closer inspection, the comparison can go far beyond the titles.
While Neil Diamond and Conway Twitty frequently have different musical styles, they are both legendary performers and entertainers. These are men who don't just sing a song, they put on a show. Also, I discovered both of these songs in the exact same way. I was originally exposed to them via television commercials for As Seen On TV music collections. You know the ones. Two CDs or two cassettes for a low, low price, chock full of the Super Hits Of The Seventies or maybe The Best Of Country Music that you crave. Well, back when I first heard these songs, they were available on two LPs or two cassettes, but I digress.
The first time I saw the commercial that featured Forever In Blue Jeans I thought the song was great. Of course, I also thought that Mr. Diamond was saying that he would much rather be A Rebel In Blue Jeans. Now, I was an eight-year-old fan of Duran Duran, but even I could see that Neil Diamond wasn't much of a rebel. (I want to say he was wearing one of his spangly red stage outfits in the commercial, but while it is very likely, it still might just be wishful thinking on my part.) But even though he didn't look particularly rebellious, I approved of his desire to be a rebel in blue jeans.
You can imagine how crushed I was the day I was singing that song and my dad told me that it was called Forever In Blue Jeans. While that could be taken as rebellious, it's just not as good. And then there is Tight Fittin' Jeans. I remember that particular commercial because I was horrified by the look on Conway Twitty's face when he told us about how he loved that lady in...Tight Fittin' Jeans. If memory serves, he was leering. A leering Conway Twitty is not the Conway Twitty I want to be looking at on my television.
But even though I love both of these songs, something is bothering me. Neither one of these songs is actually about jeans. I love blue jeans, and I wish that these songs did too. Even though I spend my life trumpeting about how much I love ugly pants, my one true love (in the category trousers owned by me) are the pants made by Levi Strauss. These pants aren't made for Bret Michaels, they are made just for me. I can pick my waist, I can pick my inseam (they are the same-my jeans are just as square as I am), and I can pick my fit. (The tag says Regular Fit Straight Leg. My jeans are also as humorless about jeans as I am.)
This is one of the few products that I am willing to buy new, why shouldn't they be immortalized in song? I can't be the only person who feels this way about blue jeans. I love them. I love them so much I am willing to venture into an actual department store to buy them. But even though these songs lead you to believe they are going to crow about the wonders of denim, they do not follow through. I am very, very disappointed that neither Neil nor Conway is actually talking about the virtues of dungarees.
Neil Diamond is using the concept of blue jeans to illustrate how he would rather be happy than have money. Therefore, if he is forever in blue jeans it's because that is what he can afford. Meanwhile, Conway Twitty is not excited about the tight fitting jeans as much as he is excited about the lady contained in the tight fitting jeans. By the way, she'll always be a lady to him. (Ew!)
So even though I like both of the above mentioned songs, I am still wondering why I don't know any songs about the sheer fabulousness of blue jeans. There has to be at least one out there, why isn't it more popular? Blue jeans are part of the uniform of rock and roll, and more bands should be paying them tribute.