My current temp job, which I enjoy immensely, is composed mainly of downtime. As a result, I have a chance to read all kinds of web sites that I do not include in my regular browsing at home. For instance, these days I can visit Billboard and read the music news. It's a site I don't frequent at home because it takes forever to load (my computer is older than C. Montgomery Burns) and their news section isn't large enough to warrant the wait. But even though I live in the 1970s, sometimes (when I have extra time) I will make a weak attempt to stay current.
A couple of weeks ago, I was skimming the headlines because even though I will end up reading all of the articles, I still want to read the good ones first. Well, the articles that I think sound good. That is when I saw a headline that baffled me. It said something along the lines of Duff signs on for CBS sitcom. I know that Monty and the Mustachioed Drummer can see this one coming, but if you can't, I'll tell you what went through my head.
I thought, "They gave Duff a sitcom? What?" When I saw that headline, I naturally assumed that Duff meant Duff McKagan, bass player from Guns N' Roses. The real Guns N' Roses, not the modern buckety version. I didn't even know that Duff was funny! I wondered, how could he have gotten a contract with CBS? He's kind of been off the radar for some time now. But who else could it be? What other Duff is there?
It was Hilary Duff.
Oh.
Common sense told me that it wasn't going to be Duff McKagan, but I was still hopeful. I remember hearing that Nikki Sixx was developing a reality show, so why couldn't Duff McKagan have a sitcom? I would watch CBS if they gave Duff a TV show. Or he could have a talk show! Slash could be his sidekick! No, Gilby Clarke could be his sidekick. No, a chimp could be his sidekick. Okay, scrap the talk show idea but keep the chimp. Duff could be a rock star and the chimp could be his personal assistant. I would watch that show.