I had to buy a Scott Baio album this weekend. I guess technically I didn't have to but I cannot say no to a record made by a teen idol. This was an especially exciting find because I was not aware that Scott Baio had made more than one album. I own his album The Boys Are Out Tonight but it never occurred to me that he had released more than one record. This is because I forgot to use my critical thinking skills.
I was ignoring a major trend in the teen idol genre: the self-titled debut album. Of course Scott Baio had a self-titled debut album, many of my own favorites used that strategy. A quick review of teen idols I enjoy found self-titled debut albums by Shaun Cassidy, the Bay City Rollers, the Monkees, and Leif Garrett. Bobby Sherman, John Travolta, and the New Kids On The Block also employed the same tactic.
I firmly believe that it is a tactic created to make it as easy as possible to sell records. Imagine you are working in a record store in 1976 when an eleven-year-old girl walks in. You should be able to tell from the feathered hair and tube socks coupled with flood ankle bellbottoms that she wants to buy the Bay City Rollers, but maybe you are new on the job. Or maybe you are really into Electric Light Orchestra and all that garbage sounds the same to you.
Either way, you will be able to help because when she asks for the Bay City Rollers record you don't have to guess what she means. If their album had been called, say, Saturday Night and she asked you for Saturday Night it may have taken a call to your little sister to figure out the artist. Thanks to the self-titled debut LP the transaction is fast so you can go right back to discussing the possibility of a Beatles reunion with your co-workers and everyone involved is happy. Marketing!
Even with all of the self-titled debut evidence in my own collection I never thought that Scott Baio could have more than one album. That could be because I remembered The Boys Are Out Tonight as being really, really bad and I prefer not to think of Scott Baio's recording career at all. Then I was walking through a record store this weekend and there was Scott Baio, right in the front of the recent arrivals section. I'm wondering if it was placed there by a customer or an employee, but I can almost guarantee that the culprit was snickering.
No matter how it came to my attention, once it was spotted I had to make the purchase. I needed to round out the collection! That is assuming that Scott Baio only has two records. He does, but at the time I didn't know. I was afraid I would have to seek out even more Scott Baio albums. I guess technically I didn't have to but once you own two Scott Baio records there is no point in not buying the rest of them.
The cover of Scott Baio is amusing in a targeted-to-youths kind of way. He is in a non-threatening (yet dreamy) pose that looked really familiar. I realized that his album cover pose is almost identical to the one on the cover of Thriller. Both records came out in 1982. Coincidence? Actually, I don't know if Thriller was an instant hit or if it even was released before Scott Baio so maybe it is a coincidence. Unfortunately Scott Baio isn't wearing a white suit, he is instead sporting a banana yellow sweatshirt and jeans.
He is wearing the same outfit on the back cover, only this time he is standing with his hands on his hips with a cutesy-pie warning look on his face. "Watch out girls, I might snuggle you," is what he appears to be saying. The inner sleeve is where the art really goes for broke. On one side, the full face shot where his chin is resting on his forearm. You know he is just wishing he had the right gal, it could be you! On the other side, he is pictured dialing a phone. Maybe he's calling the right gal, it could be you!
And the music, well, it's pretty much par for the course. Pop songs that rhyme eyes with surprise and kiss with miss. In the same song. I used to think that the Bay City Rollers using run, sun, fun, and one in a single line was too much, but compared to Scott Baio that rhyme scheme is a stroke of genius. That brings me to the main problem with the Scott Baio albums. I have just listened to them both (back to back) and I know good and well that if they were Shaun Cassidy records I would love them.
Shaun Cassidy is one of my favorites and if he had recorded the exact same songs with the exact same arrangements I would think they were fine and dandy. The problem is...I never loved Chachi. I liked Potsie. As a child, nothing beat the fact that Anson Williams was one of the celebrity judges on Dance Fever, like, every week. I had no use for Chachi and I certainly didn't want Charles in charge of my days or my nights. Since I was never a Scott Baio gal I don't find these records to be all that great. They are typical teen idol albums but since he isn't one of my teen idols, I'm not impressed.